noveltune Chapter 9 Choosing a House: Is this the legendary 5-star pigsty?
Chapter 9 Choosing a House: Is this the legendary 5-star pigsty?
The housing rush ended without any suspense; it could even be described as a highly targeted "encirclement and suppression."
In the "musical chairs" game just now, top star Lu Ming and the seemingly honest Wang Lei actually played a tactical teamwork game. The two of them, one on the left and one on the right, managed to keep Lin Zhou, who had the best physical strength, firmly stuck on the outer circle.
The results are obvious.
Lu Ming acquired the first luxurious European-style villa, Wang Lei took the second cozy brick house, and Chen Kai took the third simple but clean wooden house.
All that was left for Lin Zhou's family was a photo of room number four with a question mark on it.
Director Yan Min's smile at that moment seemed particularly kind and irritating: "Room number four is a 'treasure' of our Peach Blossom Village, full of original rural charm. Ordinary people can't even get a room there."
Half an hour later, when Lin Zhou stood in front of the so-called "treasure," he deeply understood what it meant to say, "A man's words are deceitful."
Before me stood a mud-brick house that looked as if it might fall apart in the wind at any moment.
The plaster on the walls peeled off like moss on a balding dog, revealing uneven patches of yellow mud and straw underneath. The roof tiles were sparse, like the stubborn few strands of hair on a balding old man's head, stubbornly blocking out the sunlight. The rickety wooden door had only half a hinge hanging from the frame, and when the wind blew, it made a teeth-grinding "creak" sound, like the welcoming music of a haunted house.
But that's not the most desperate thing.
The most desperate thing is that the house is right next to the village's collective pig farm.
The two were separated only by a fence less than a meter high. The rich, pungent smell of fermented feed mixed with excrement, which hit you right in the head, wafted over under the scorching sun.
"vomit--"
As soon as Su Qingge got out of the car, before she could even take off her elegant sunglasses, she was overwhelmed by the "countryside vibe" and turned pale, clutching her chest and dry heaving.
She pointed incredulously at the dilapidated black hole, her fingers trembling, her voice shrill with shock:
"Yan Min! You call this a house? This is a pigsty! And it's open-air!"
Nuonuo was also terrified.
The little one hid behind Lin Zhou's legs, her chubby little hands tightly gripping his trouser leg, and asked in a tearful voice, "Daddy, does that pig want to sleep with us? It smells so bad, Nuonuo doesn't want to sleep with it..."
Just then, Lu Ming, who had obtained the key to the luxury villa, happened to pass by.
He sat on the production crew's electric cart, looking at the disheveled Lin Zhou family, his smugness practically overflowing. He even feigned concern, stopping the cart and calling out, "..."
"Oh dear, Brother Lin, Sister Qingge, your environment... is indeed a bit harsh. But Director Yan said it's called getting close to nature! Look at that pig, so robust, it looks like it's blessed!"
After saying that, he deliberately covered the nose of his little nephew in his arms, as if afraid of being infected by his poverty, and urged the driver to drive away quickly, leaving behind a string of gloating laughter.
Su Qingge was so angry that she trembled all over, and her eyes instantly turned red.
She was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and was treated like royalty after entering the entertainment industry. When has she ever suffered such grievances?
[At this point, I hope readers will remember our domain name: ①⓪①ⓚⓚⓢ.ⓒⓞⓜ]
"I'm not recording anymore."
Su Qingge turned around, staring intently at the catching-up cameraman, her tone resolute, "I'll pay whatever the penalty for breach of contract is! This place is completely uninhabitable! It's full of dust and mold, and Nuonuo has a history of asthma. If she has an attack, who will be responsible?"
The netizens who were initially watching the spectacle fell silent in the live chat.
"To be fair, the production team really went too far this time."
"This isn't experiencing life, it's wilderness survival!"
"Goddess Su was almost crying; I could smell the stench even through the screen."
"Where's Lin Zhou? Why isn't this gigolo saying anything at a time like this? Is he scared out of his wits?"
Lin Zhou did not say anything.
He was squinting as he walked around the dilapidated house.
Although dilapidated, the house's frame was still intact, and the foundation was paved with bluestone slabs, making it fairly sturdy. Most importantly, there was a hand pump well in the yard, with an earthen stove built next to it, which was practically a godsend for him, given his [god-level culinary skills].
As for the filth and disorder?
Is that even a problem for someone as skilled as him?
"Stop fooling around."
Lin Zhou walked back and gently patted Su Qingge's trembling shoulder. His palm was warm and dry, carrying a strangely reassuring power.
"Three hundred million, you can afford to pay it, but I can't."
"But..." Su Qingge looked up, her eyes red, her face full of resistance and helplessness, "How can we live here? There's not even a place to stand, and it stinks so badly..."
"Who said you could stay here?"
Lin Zhou raised an eyebrow, casually took off his already soaked T-shirt, wrung it out, and sweat dripped onto the dry, cracked yellow earth.
He was shirtless, revealing a muscular physique that gleamed bronze in the sunlight, exuding an explosive amount of hormones.
"You wait outside and keep an eye on Nuonuo."
After saying that, Lin Zhou turned around and, without the slightest hesitation, strode forward and kicked open the rickety wooden door, stepping into the dimly lit space filled with dust and mildew.
"Cough cough cough—"
Dust flew everywhere.
Lin Zhou waved his hand, his gaze quickly scanning the room.
The room was a mess, as if it had been burgled. Broken tables and chairs were scattered all over the floor, and cobwebs covered the corners. But in one corner, he found a dusty toolbox containing several rusty hammers, a saw, and a bucket of white lime that had been sitting there for who knows how many years.
The instant his hand touched the hammer.
**[Ding! Host is facing a housing crisis!]**
**[Skill Trigger: God-Level Home Renovation (Master Level)!]**
**[Skill Description: With the right tools, you're like Lu Ban reincarnated! Turn the ordinary into the extraordinary; any broken item can become a work of art in your hands! Bonus: "Max Level Cleaning Skill" effect, allowing you to do housework faster than anyone else!]**
A vast amount of knowledge about architecture and decoration instantly flooded into Lin Zhou's mind, and he felt as if the hammer in his hand had become a part of his body.
A confident smile curved his lips.
Five-star pigsty?
Today I'll show you what a "luxury wilderness" B&B really is!
"Lin Zhou! Are you crazy? What are you trying to do?"
Su Qingge's anxious voice came from outside the door. She saw Lin Zhou shirtless, rummaging through the garbage-filled room, and thought he had suffered a mental breakdown due to excessive stress.
Lin Zhou didn't turn around, but simply raised the rusty hammer in his hand and twirled it gracefully in the air. The sound clearly came from the dimly lit room:
"What for? To build you and our daughter a castle, of course. Su Qingge, give me two hours. If you're still not satisfied by then, we're packing our bags and leaving right now. The 300 million yuan penalty for breach of contract—I'll sell my blood to make up for it!"